How to regulate your emotions by improving your emotional intelligence 

BySOWMIYA S

How many times have we felt overwhelmed and unable to process our emotions in different situations ,environments and with different people? I have faced it many times during my initial work environment. Due to the toxic work culture I was not able to make rational decisions that made me make multiple wrong decisions in a row. Being aware of our own emotions, being in tune within ourselves can help us navigate life more easily helping us live a better version of ourselves. 

Emotional Intelligence is a need of the hour skill, where understanding how we are feeling, accepting and regulating our emotions can help us succeed in our personal and professional lives. Emotionally intelligent people tend to do well academically, are better problem solvers, decision makers and leaders.

Emotional Intelligence is not only about being in tune with our emotions, but understanding and interpreting others emotions. This will also help us become better at whatever role we are performing be it an employee understanding your manager’s emotions or being a husband understanding your wife’s emotions.

Recent posts

5 characteristics of emotional intelligence

The concept of Emotional Intelligence was popularized by American psychologist Daniel Goleman in his book Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ. In his book he describes the 5 important elements of emotional intelligence.

Self awareness

Being self aware means the ability to understand your emotions. It also includes how we take action according to our emotions and being aware of how others perceive them. It is the thin line between what we feel and what we do according to our feeling.

The ability to have a clear view of your strengths and weaknesses can help you make better decisions in life.

Self regulation 

The next step to being self aware of our emotions is self regulation. How we regulate the emotions that we are feeling and express them. It is about how we understand our emotions and manage our impulses instead of getting overwhelmed.

Self regulation doesn’t mean hiding down your feelings, it means understanding why you feel them and responding to others in an appropriate way.

Motivation

People with higher emotional intelligence are naturally motivated and can take action on their goals. They also have the ability to motivate and inspire others while working in a team. These people are always committed to doing better, setting goals and taking action on them.

Empathy 

This element of emotional intelligence is about understanding the emotions of other people. Empathy a form of awareness that helps us to understand and relate another persons’ feelings without judgement. Being empathetic helps you to relate to others feelings as well and helps you to make great connections with people in your daily life. This also helps us to understand how our actions might affect others. 

Social Skills

Social skills are connected to individuals having higher Emotional Intelligence. Understanding your own emotions and others helps you in building healthy social relationships. Being able to listen to another person, interacting with people and the ability to communicate your feelings to others is the key of living as an emotionally intelligent person.

Emotional Intelligence is a soft skill that can be easily developed over time, so you don’t have to be born with it. So here are the few steps that you can follow regularly to cultivate emotional intelligence.

Steps to develop and improve emotional Intelligence 

Try journalling

Journalling has helped me in so many ways that I never expected out of it. When you journal your thoughts are poured into paper and it is out of your mind. When you see your thoughts on paper you can clearly understand why you felt and acted a certain way. It is a way of seeing inside yourself. By doing this practice regularly you will become self aware and develop emotional intelligence. 

marisa
Shadow work 

This is nothing but answering yourself a few questions that will help you understand your view of life. You can just go up to Pinterest and find so many shadow work questions and take time out to try them. They will help you to understand more about yourself, your thoughts and your inner self. In turn helping you being more self aware and self regulate yourself.

Cheryl Williams
Be accountable 

When you know that you have made a mistake take responsibility of your actions and be accountable. When you know that you haven’t prepared for an exam and scored low in it. Instead of blaming that it was hard or something, acknowledge to yourself that it was your mistake. Then take action for the future. Being accountable will help you to understand the issue and solve the problem instead of finding other distractions to blame.

Request feedback 

When you are in a workspace ask for feedback, to understand what your company is expecting out of you. This will help you to work accordingly and be more motivated towards your goals. Doing this will also improve your social skills, helping you to be better at having good connections and conversations at the workplace. Even when you are in a relationship, ask your partner how they are feeling about your actions, understand them and change your ways accordingly.

Cultivate the art of listening 

Only when we learn to listen to others without thinking about what to reply next or judging them we can truly learn empathy. Listening is the highest form of emotional intelligence if you ask me. The ability to perceive others feelings and being at present helps us to truly connect with others and their emotions. To actively listen, try asking questions related to what the person is speaking, nodding and indulge in the conversation.  

Practice Patience 

Emotionally intelligent people talk less and think before talking, not rushing to talk. Cultivating patience can help you to take a step back from your feelings and emotions. Helping you to evaluate your thoughts and act in an appropriate way. This will help you to be more put together and not all over the place. 

Engage in social activities 

Block certain days in your month for engaging in social activities. I would recommend you to go to activities that involves speaking with strangers. This will help to come out of your comfort zone and talk to different types of people and learn to engage with them. Team building activities will help you greatly to learn to work in a team, be a leader, be a team player. Engaging in social activities will help you to be develop emotional intelligence. 

Light of Alchemy

Having a good level of emotional intelligence is important in our lives, because humans are social animals. We need each other to survive this world, so we might as well learn to better at expressing our emotions and understanding others. This will help us to build self confidence and help ourselves by being calm even under pressure.

I hope you loved this blogpost. Let me know in the comments below on which are the first steps that you are going to follow for improving your emotional intelligence.

Post Views: 1,193